Uncle Howard pulled a whopper at Brighton Pride!
I had a fucking fantastic time at this year’s Brighton Pride, the parade was fabulous with its Carry On theme and effigies of Barbara Windsor’s massive tits, I met the world’s oldest lesbian and some lovely nurses.
Who I didn’t meet, though, was my lovely Uncle Howard. Always the apple of Nana Corin’s eye, Howard came to the UK when he was just 10, sold as a sex slave to the British Royalty. So successful was he, that he earned his freedom just 10 years later - Time Off For Good Head, is the official term. Since then he’s been happily serving (and living off) the landed gentry, earning his fortune and being treated like a well-groomed pet, except they’d get fucked more often.
Anyway, he told me he was coming to Brighton for Pride and suggested we meet up at Preston Park, maybe take some Rohypnol together and go and sexually harass the boys in the Wildfruit tent.
Sadly I was fucking cunted off my tits by the time I got to the park - there was Rohypnol, there were boys and there was a tent or two, but there was no Uncle Howard! I spoke to him a few days later, when I got my voice back, and he said he’d missed me, but had managed to have fun by himself.
Or not quite by himself, he met these two American guys who introduced him to the game of Slap My Thigh! Which is really not about slapping thighs at all, more pummelling cocks until they’re black and blue, and seeping pus, but they like to keep the game sounding family-friendly.
After the fun in the park wound down, Howard took the Yanks back to his hotel room for a spot of anal-rape. Not that he particularly wanted to, he’s had bluer blood than that in his time, but threesomes were the thing at this year’s Pride and no gay with any self-esteem was going home on his own that night.
Nor was I, but that’s a different story.
;)
Uncle Howard and his cock-spanking Yank buddies at Brighton Pride, 2006
August 31st, 2006 at 5:35 am
Uncle Howard could be the star of “Puppetry of the Penis,” that show that gives guys an opportunity to stretch their acting muscles. However, it looks like they would have to expand his part… there are no big parts, only big actors.
September 5th, 2006 at 6:57 pm
you can always tell a rubber dick when you see one.