♥ shhexycorin ♥

It updates slightly more often than my blog.

New slideshow gubbins

Flickr has listened to its users, who have been protesting all week over the heinous lack of doughnuts on Flickr.

The protest has been a decidedly dirty one, with underhand tactics used by both sides. Flickr finally caved under the pressure and announced that they would give us donuts!

The enormity of this has not escaped the world’s press who have realised that our demand for doughnuts was much more important than other nonsensical crap (eg. threat of lawsuits) over the introduction of Flickr Video.

Digg it!

YAY! Flickr has added videos. It’s pretty fucking cool, not least because people are so pissed off about it.

The reason it was created, though, was something of a secret. Until today… What the world needs is thousands, nay, MILLIONS of videos of things at ludicrous speed with the Benny Hill music in the background.

I have created a group for this very purpose, called Benny Hill Videos, it is already the most popular group on Flickr! Join today… invite all your friends!

The showcase piece for the Benny Hill Videos group, is the second in the Easter Photowalk series, a follow-up to 2007’s masterpiece. Ladies and gentlemen, I give the Easter Videowalk, 2008:

Should you wish to listen to the Benny Hill theme tune, you can do so here:
Benny Hill, Yakety Sax

Pigsty Avenue asked where the cunting bookmarklets were for voting in DMU, so I’m putting them here.

Drag the 2 links below to your browser bookmarks

Delete!

Save!

Maybe that’ll shut the whiny cunt up.

Now, get voting!

Day 51: I am giving up meat for Lent.
Originally uploaded by beebo wallace.

More and more of of my Flickr buddies are starting up on this 365 shit, where you’re supposed to post 365 self-portraits in a year. Not necessarily one a day, but one for every day of the year.

Infamous cunt and internet muse, Beebo Wallace started it in the new year and he gets HOTTER with every day that passes. People are more interesting than pictures of walls or rust or flowers, especially people you know. The group has a voyeuristic pleasure and is a stalker’s delight. Therefore, I’m a massive fan.

Still full of cunts though, but then, it is Flickr.

I’m going to start a 366 day group for next year, just to piss them off! I’m sure it will make everyone very angry, oh yes.
;)

I beat this fuck-ugly kid up

My, um, fortnightly round-up of the twats on Flickr is only coming about because Flickr is down, I can’t sleep late and I feel like having a bit of a jibber-jabber.

The first example of how people on Flickr are increasingly wrong in the head, started happening about a month ago. I got home from an accidental drug-fuelled orgy at 7am one Saturday morning, to find a Flickrmail from ellipse asking me what I thought about becoming an admin in FlickrCentral. I’m not sure how to explain to a stranger just how fucked up this is, friends have described it as “as if they’d asked Martin Luther King to become President of the United States”, “one of the greatest pieces of humour I have ever seen”, “a massive fucking sell-out, you corporate cunt”. One of my mentors, Helen Keller, told me she never thought she’d see such a miracle in all her life!

The FC admins fannied about for weeks before actually promoting me, due to sheer laziness on their part, but they finally flipped the switch on Sunday night. Monday was great fun, a couple of my mates knew already but most people did not have a fucking clue what was going on. ACE.

I’m frequently labelled a “troll” and is as NIPSA as they come, but now I’m one of the boring cunts I once spent so long ridiculing. The world has flipped upside down, I tell you. Proof? I spent some of yesterday evening discussing dogging with Heather in FlickrCentral. That’s just not right.

The next thing I knew, Flickr staff were so insanely jealous of the excitement going on around me, that they steal my thunder by making their announcement about forcing old skool users to merge their accounts with a Yahoo ID. God, from the user reaction, you’d think they’d been told to rape their firstborn in the face with a AIDS-tipped shovel or something.

All I’m going to say on the matteris that being self-righteous and tedious doesn’t stop you from being a cunt. In fact, it guarantees you a place in the hallowed halls of Cuntdom, maybe with a little plaque telling passersby of your cunty achievements. I really should be working in a customer-facing role, yes.

God, but people get upset about shite on the internet, don’t they?

A massive gripe amongst the Flickr Flappers at the moment is the idea that blogging a picture off the site is theft and that these people should be punished. That it is outrageous that someone could consider blogging without asking permission to do so! Some cunts are really missing the point of the internet, methinks. Namely that the internet exists as a method of sharing information, that blogging is a big part of this and that generally if a Flickr picture gets blogged it is a good thing.

One above that in the hysterical hand-flapping charts are the Petitions to Flickr lot. As far as I can make out, this came about because some dodgy porn site was scraping pictures of children off Flickr and posting them in a dodgy location.

Of course, this is unacceptable, but the furore that followed was a fantastic display of ignorance. They have been making all manner of suggestions as to how Flickr can stop paedophilia - ranging from demanding creditcard verification before allowing an account to be opened, to tracking all IP addresses and sending them to the FBI, blocking anyone that ever faved a picture of a child… the list was too ludicrous to bother investigating, check the group out if you’re interested. Don’t these people realise that all paedos get castrated before they reach puberty these days?

Another case of idiots escaping the asylum. They post pictures of their precious kids on the internet and then call anyone who looks at them a paedophile. Because a paedo is never going to be a parent, relative, neighbour or friend, is it? Not in 95% of cases? Implausible.

I just wanted to point out that they should be grateful the pervs were just wanking over their kids and not raping them… But I figured that some parents might view this as though their kids were under-achievers, so I buttoned my lip.

Last, but not least, is the story of the twat in the US who left $10,000 of camera equipment under a jacket and is getting idiots on Flickr to fund buying him new gear because apparently his insurance won’t cover it. Unbelievable.

I got twatted with lomokev on Friday and offered a copy of the picture below, signed by the both of us. But they deleted my thread and banned me from the group.

Ungrateful cunts.
:(

5olly is much shhexier than Hitler

5olly is the shhexiest motherfucker I know, so we’ve just set up a group on Flickr to find out if he really his.

It’s called Shhexier Than 5olly? and is possibly the most exciting thing on the internet at the moment. The premise is simple, add your shhexiest shot and the group will vote “5olly” or “shhexy” depending on whether they think you’re repulsive or not.

To make things easier, we’ve got some groovy bookmarklets that allow for easy, automated tagging and commenting for the group. They only work in Firefox or Flock though, so get one of those browsers.

Drag each of the following links up into your bookmarks bar:

Shhexy!

5olly!

Once the bookmarklet is in your Links bar you’re all set. Browse to a photo in the Shhexier Than 5olly pool, write your comment and then click the bookmark. The correct tag to the photo will be automatically added to the photo you are viewing.

Oh, and join the fucking group. Or I will kill you.

Wholesome cock-slapping fun!

Many’s the time I ran around the gardens of my master’s estate, hiding from the giant squishy penis that was chasing me… running into the maze, getting lost, only to find myself again.

If all children spent more time around fucking massive cocks, then maybe the world wouldn’t be so fucked up. Maybe people would be happy and all the nasty things that happen would stop.

There’s enough hurt in this world, why cause more?

Feel the cock, feel the love!
:)

Shhexy Elephant Cunt

BigFrank is a wildlife photographer who could put David Attenborough to shame.

On safari in the petting zoo, Frank had been watching the bunnies humping for a couple of hours, getting hundreds of shots for some new HDR work he’s planning.

After feeding time at 4, the bunnies got tired, and Frank accidentally stumbled into the depths of the elephant enclosure, looking for somewhere to go for a wee. He was just reaching down for a leaf when Gertie, the matriarch, started rubbing her bits on Frank’s back in a clear state of arousal.

Pro-photographer to the very end, Frank risked life and limb to get this XXX shot of an elephant’s vagina.

Such a pretty cunt, wouldn’t you agree? GO FRANK.